Social Icons

Thursday, 17 May 2012

Australia - Why You So Crazy?

I know that I write about stupid shit happening in Australia a lot. The reason for this is because the vast majority of smoker-hating insanity seems to be coming from there these past few years.  Certainly the Root of All Evil has much to do with all the hate, as well as ASH Australia (who are clearly some of the dumbest motherfuckers to have ever existed on this blue-green orb).  Still, to be fair to Australia, you can go anywhere and find hateful morons.  But to me it does seem as though most of the hate is emanating from Oz.  Take this article for example, where mother-of-two Lara Adams makes the very bold and idiotic claim that she is being discriminated against in respect of the uber-hazardous toxic smoke-drift:

"As non-smokers we are discriminated against because we can't keep our home the way we like it."

What? Non-smoker discrimination, you say?  You don't want to open a window and you're the victim of discrimination? Surely, I have read that wrong. No, wait, I haven't.  Lara, dear, there is no such thing and you have it completely backwards. All of the discrimination is directed solely at smokers, and maybe fat people. You as a non-smoker have not been the subject of any discrimination in respect of smoke-free laws in private businesses,  restaurants, and public places.  Smokers have. Not you.  Hey look, you're a reader and possibly a member of Tobacco Free Australia on Facebook.  That's just lovely. Good to see you declared that interest in the article linked above... oh, you didn't, did you.  That's OK. We're used to that.

But let's delve a little deeper into this.  Lara Adams, who is evidently a stooge for tobacco control, lives in Chippendale, a suburb of Sydney.  Let's have a looksy via Google Maps:

Wow, it does look urbanised. Look at all those streets. Do people not drive on them? Is there no pollution from cars at all?  Is that a train station? Oh, hey, look, I see the Root of All Evil's home turf there... the absurd and increasingly hateful health-conscious University of Sydney.  Well, looking about the area, it seems to me that super "toxic" smoke-drift is the least of your worries since you live in a "high-density" area, as you say. 

Try this relatively easy experiment to test toxicity, Lara. Find a standard home garage and invite 10 to 20 smokers and at least one non-smoker, and seal up the garage with all doors and windows shut, and have the smokers puff away all day.  Give them at least 5 hours in there, up to 24 hours if you'd like, smoking all that time. Be nice, Lara, give them food and water. When you open up the door, count the number of dead people.  That number will be 0.  Zero.  Fascinating, huh?  But we're not done yet. Now, get into your car and drive it into that same garage and do not turn off the engine.  Stick a person or two in there. It could be anyone you don't like, like an ex-husband and his new, hot girlfriend perhaps.  Now, leave the car running and seal up the garage.  This won't take as long as the previous experiment.  Give it an hour, maybe two tops, and go have some lunch and nice bottle of wine.  In a few hours, open up the garage, and hey, look, guess what?  You can see dead people.  Yep, they'll be dead.  No, really, all dead.  It's a good experiment. 

So, what have we learnt, Lara?  Car exhaust kills, second-hand smoke does not.  That's today's lesson.  Oh, and you aren't a victim of discrimination.  Not at all, you daft bint.